Stalked!

I have been meaning to write up a couple of episodes occurring in my life recently.

I am a bugger at resisting religious and celebratory events, the whole Christmas shenanigans leaves me cold, and so does Valentine’s Day. As far as I can see the whole thing is there just to get you to pay 40 quid for some roses you could get for a tenner at any other time of the year. I also think guuilt has a lot to do with it too.

Anyhow as usual Valentine’s Day seemed ages away, and I had sort of booked a night out with Sheila, admittedly it was on the 15th, so I had sort of put the actual day to the back of my mind somewhat.

On the actual day Sheila’s early morning phone culminated in me admitting at that stage I hadnt bought a card, but was going to sort it out by the end of play. I had t work in the early evening and I had planned to drive up to Southport, with the card, witht the flowers, and with the pressies.

During the day I was looking for the opportunity to get out and buy a card, didnt quite manage that either.All day in the Fazakerley lots of strange thigns started to happen, including a heart covered “Steve’s Luv Mug” appearing, a small toy dog in my coat pocket, a cloth rose left on my desk, a valentine cracker left on my windscreen  a pack of sweet hearts elft on my desk and most msyteriosuly of all  a pack of “hot lips” (chilli flavoured chocolates) unceremoniuosly handed over to me by Pauline the receptionist (not known for her sense of humour). So by this time I am almost frantic to find out who has been doing this “Valentine stalking”. It had to be my workmate Wes, but why would he be doing it, and if it wasnt him who was it?

Anyhow after a quick trip to (the) ASDA on the way home to buy a cd a dvd, card and flowers, I get home and find much to my surprsie that Sheila has called on me left a table strewn with rose petals a single red rose a prepared tea ete etc (you can now see what I’m up against here) so I think  “she’s been, she has had to go home and left me my tea”. I decided I needed to hide the evidence of the day’s gifts, so I pulled the cracker and stuffed the warapping down deep into the bin, and had all the cards and gifts gathered together when I turn aorund and there is the woman in question, Sheila…. suddenly the penny drops maybe she was behind all this stalkery, especially after she says “Why have ypu pulled the cracker yoruself?”  “Er…..well I didnt want you to see if in case you got jealous”…….DUH!