Too much Klinging on for my liking

Keep finding a phrase in the local press about Klingons, Lib dems Kling on to power, etc etc.

 

I’m a bit confused (yeah but what’s new about that).

 

What I thought the Klingons were a sci-fictious race from Star Trek, so what have this foul mob have have to do with Liverpool City Council you may ask?.

 

 

 

(Mike Storey and his son Wez seen leaving a local tanning salon)

 

I knew there was a Doctor Who connection what with Mike Storey’s constant “regenerations”, one minute he’s normal colour then he looks the colour of cheap Egyptian souvenir handbag, one minute he’s a primary head, a flash of light and he’s “Culture Man”, then he isn’t .

 

So who are these Klingons whjo keep klingin’ onto power?

 

Well there’s chancellor War Brad,

(War Brad……looking stern but fair)

 

famous for his infectious laugh (cackle?) inflammable humour and liking for emails and FOI questions (ask Paul Decline).

 

 

Then there’s Fol Luccas,

 

 

 

the humourless and Gok eating side kick.

 

 

Finally the third character in this space drama is

 

Col. L.Ridge

 

(half Human Half Klingon. completely evil, all the worse bits of each race) who really just wants the simple of life of being an MP.

 

 

Maybe the local press should desist from using the expression Clingon/Klingon and use the colloquial Liverpool expression “Whinnet” instead.

 

So what’s a whinnet then, well obviously the lib dems didn’t do this at the last local elections (they didn’t win it! get it?) but actually any self respecting scouser will tell you that a “Whinnet” (or Klingon) is, it’s an annoying lump of shit stuck to your arse which just refuses to go away. 

 

 

Sounds about right to me,

 

Beam me Up Joe.

 

Joe “Shatner” Anderson

Banzai!!! 7 Samurai come to rescue Kenny

 

 

 

Toshiro Mifune giving it large!!!

Thanks to an initiative from the METAL guys and gals one of my most favourite films of all time is being screened in the space they operate in Edge Hill railway station.

The utterly fantastic “Seven Samurai” by Akira Kurasawa is on FRIDAY 23rd MAY at 6.30pm it’s free but you need to book a place.

Jenny Porter
Project Manager, Metal Liverpool
T: +44 (0) 151 261 0514
E: jenny@metalculture.com
W: http://www.metalculture.com

If you dont know the film it’s the story of  a village of peasants who hire the seven samurai to protect them from raiders. The Magnificent Seven and Battle Beyond the Stars amongst others, these were based on the same story, but are not a patch on the original.

Anyhow if you dont go you’ll miss an amazing experience, dont be put off by the fact it is older than me (1954) in Black and White and has sub titles, its got funny bits, action, sadness, and feeling of fufilment at the end..Just come along wach and enjoy, it’s a cracker.

 

 

 

Hello Goodbye

not sure whether the title is the right way around but as of last week I have handed in my notice at Alt Valley Vision to concentrate on developing ideas and projects for KensingtonVision, this includes putting the application together for the full time licence for a kensington communtiy radio station to OFCOM. This needs to be spot on and handed in for October.

So watch this space for new developments proejcts etc.

Old Dick and Photoshop

Dont you hate it when old people get into computers. I suspect Old Dick has got a copy of Photoshop given what was in the envelope with the poem.

More Bloody (bad) Poetry

It’s election time and our long standing lib dem councillor Frank Doran was voted out! This was obviously the result of me canvassing for Liam Robinson for 44 minutes yesterday, I knew those two people with amercian pitbull on molyneux road would make all the difference as the mjaority turned out to be just 2 (the majority was actually 200 so stop lying Ed.)

It is the first time in a long time that I have ever politically campaigned, ever since accidentally becoming involved in the tuebrook miltants in the 80’s and became Terry Field’s “Bitch” (I’ll tell you that story another time).

I’m sure Frank will find lots of things to do with his spare time and I invite him get involved in a non patisan way with the community as opposed to towing the line on all things libdem and council directed-come on Frank admit to the Nighbourhood Centre being a total waste of money and just a bit of shite idea….go on go on go on…alright dont then dont.

Again I had a slip of paper pushed under the door in the fine copperplate handwriting we’ve come to expect post kensington election night.

Ode to Being Frank or whatever happened to the spirit of ‘73

And so farewell Frank Doran, you’ve been undone,

By a mere slip of a lad called Li-um,

The thirty odd years since you were elected,

Have not slipped by entirely un-detected,

Because  as  I look around at our Kenny  and think  and see

At what used to be  here   In ’73,

I start to ponder at what is left  without glee,

And  longingly think of what used to be,

The Ice Rink,

The Cinemas,

The Shops,

And don’t forget Skulnicks,

Our Communitee

(This list is quite long so I cut it down considerably.SF)

I cast my minds’  eye upon what’s gone and  what’s left and feel,

The thoughts rush  uncharitably  around my mind at our so called “New Deal”,

And I can only conclude Frank, that for the past twenty years,

You’ve been well and truly

Asleep at the wheel.

 

Kensington’s own JOHN  BETJEMAN

Old Dick

 

These adult learning services creative writing courses for pensioners have a lot to answer for…well at least it ryhmes, sort of 4/10 for effort Dick .